


Hey red eyes, what's making you cry?

by Pervygayoverlord



Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Light Angst, M/M, Short, it's cute towards the end I promise, like it's implied, slight mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 05:14:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8610172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pervygayoverlord/pseuds/Pervygayoverlord
Summary: You had a cigarette hanging from your large, pink, chapped lips. You let out a shaky breath, and your eyes were tired and bloodshot. It was obvious you had been crying. I almost stopped to ask you what was wrong. I didn't. Instead of stopping I walked right past you





	

The first time I saw you I was late on my way home. I wouldn't have seen you if it hadn't been for me trying to save time by taking a different route home. It was the way down the street with that cafe and the herb stores that only the weird hippies went to. My parents don't want me to go near there. They say it's where the Wiccans and satanists go for there ritual supplies.   
It was the middle of fall and you stood out because you were only wearing a button down and a vest. Which at the time seemed ridiculous because it was 53 degrees outside.   
You were leaning against the brick wall across the street from the cafe. It was right around the corner from the main strip of business for that road. I had to turn on that road and walk right by you.   
You had a cigarette hanging from your large, pink, chapped lips. You let out a shaky breath, and your eyes were tired and bloodshot. It was obvious you had been crying.   
I almost stopped to ask you what was wrong.  
I didn't. Instead of stopping I walked right past you. 

The next time I saw you was the day after. I wanted to see if you'd be there again. You were. This time I walked by you and went into the cafe across the street. No cigarette this time, instead your lips were hidden beneath a scarf. I was glad to see you were actually wearing a jacket this time. Your eyes were rimmed with eyeliner, but it was slightly streaked and your eyes were still red. You'd still been crying.   
I watched you for an hour before you left. 

The next day I came back to the cafe. You weren't at the wall.   
You weren't there the day after that either. 

It had been five days, I came to the cafe everyday and everyday you weren't at your wall. By then I had started thinking of it as your wall. 

On day six you were back. You even asked me for the time when I walked by you. I had been so surprised I could barely stutter it out. 

Your voice is even more amazing than I could ever have expected it to be. It almost made me want to start a conversation with you so I could hear you talk.   
I didn't. I walked past you into the cafe. 

It's been a month. You've been there nearly every day for a month. Sometimes you wore a jacket. Sometimes you didn't. A few times you had bruises on your face. It made me sad to think someone was hurting you. I almost said something.   
I didn't. I kept walking. 

You smiled at me today. You said you liked my scarf. I could feel my face turn red. Hopefully you'd blame it on the cold. And if I was being honest, I'd only bought it because it reminded me of you. 

I was there before you today. It made me wonder if you'd even be at your wall today. It meant I couldn't walk past you.   
You finally got there, but you weren't wearing a jacket and your shoes didn't match. I wonder if you noticed that.   
I walked past you to get home. I didn't want to leave before you but I had to walk past you. Your eyes were red, and you were still crying. I wanted to hold you and tell you I'd fix it.  
I didn't. I walked past you and went home. 

You looked so beautiful today. Your hair was hanging in your face but I could still see your makeup. It was so much better than I'd ever be able to do. And you had earrings in too. They were small silver crosses. I even said some this time. I said you looked nice. I'm glad I did. Your smile was brighter than the moon and the stars. 

When I bought my drink today the barista asked me if I'd ever ask you out or just keep pining from a distance. I just blushed an let out an unintelligible response. 

It'd been a month and a half now. It's the middle of December and you were still at your wall. You were shivering and your nose was running. You weren't crying this time though. I'd wanted to stop and smile at you. I'd ask if you wanted to join me for a coffee out of the cold.   
I didn't. I kept walking 

You looked really broken today. You had no coat, even though it was snowing. Your eyeliner was smudged and some of it was streaked down your face. The button down you wore today had a big wet spot on the front.   
You had a cigarette hanging from between your large pink lips again. You were shaking badly too. So badly. Your nose was red. You were already so small ,so thin, I was surprised you hadn't just gone inside to stay out of the cold. I almost kept walking.   
I didn't. I stopped and asked you if you wanted a coffee.   
You laughed and said yes. 

You looked so happy today it made me smile. You were wearing a jacket and your shoes matched. There were no wet spots on your shirt, no smudged eyeliner, and no bruises.   
This time you asked me if I'd join you for coffee. I tried to buy it but you insisted on paying yourself.   
You laughed at my bad jokes. I swear I've never heard anything as beautiful as your laugh. You didn't laugh or smile very much, but when you did it makes my stomach twist.   
You said you'd see me tomorrow. I blushed and gave you a small wave goodbye.   
I almost told you I liked you.   
I didn't. I let the words die on my lips. 

A week. That's how long we've been buying each other coffee. 

You looked really nervous today. Your eyes kept flitting between me and the floor. I would've thought after knowing me for a year you would have stopped being nervous around me.   
You kept saying that I , that my friendship, was important to you. You didn't want any thing to change it. Not badly at least.   
You said that when you first saw me walk past you in that November you had wanted to be friends immediately.   
I didn't understand what you were going on about until you finally did it.   
You kissed me. I almost did nothing.   
I didn't. I kissed you back. 

How could I possibly be mad? When you looked so happy with her. You brought home a puppy. We don't have room for a dog in our apartment. But you looked down at me with those large brown eyes and your soft pink lower lip jutted out. So how could it possibly be mad at you for this?   
You said her name was Dottie. You'd always loved that name and look brenny it fits her so well. So of course I let you keep Dottie.   
I almost said something about the responsibility. But you looked at her with so much adoration.   
I didn't. I let you be content with rolling around with Dottie. 

You look so beautiful. You were shaking and crying. Tears were rolling down your face like a fountain. But you looked so beautiful.   
I had to crane my neck to see your face from where I was kneeling. You didn't expect it.  
I had taken you back to the cafe and order you a coffee. I had told you about this boy I met several years ago. I told him how I thought he was beautiful as soon as I saw him. Despite his red puffy eyes and questionable fashion taste, I thought he was so beautiful. I told you that I loved him and I wanted to marry him. When you asked who he was I just pulled out the ring and got on my knees.   
You looked so stunned and happy. You told me that yes, yes, for fucks sake Brendon, of course you would marry me.   
I almost cried from happiness.   
I didn't. I kissed you instead. 

You were smiling that smile again. The one that makes the sun and the moon and every star in the sky look dim.   
You were walking down the isle in a beautiful rose vest and a bouquet to match.   
I thought I was dreaming. I wasn't. I checked. 

You were sleeping. I could hear your slow steady breathing. You were lying next to me in our bed. Tomorrow would be our anniversary.   
We've come so far. No more controlling or abusive parents. No running out of the house scared and barely clothed for the outdoors. No more crying on the street. No more pining from a distance.   
It was just us. We were finally happy.   
The boy who was late and the boy with red eyes.   
I almost went back to sleep.   
I didn't. I kissed you instead.

Good morning red eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, this is unbeta'd so sorry if there are any mistakes. Please leave kudos and comments:)   
>  Visit me on ig: aerobicsandpinkicecream


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